~SERGIOAPODACA

Well it`s been a long while since the last time I actually sat down and decided to draw, I had been working on other psychological issues of my own, I guess it`s just the normal process of ones evolution to adulthood.

Getting along with people well, finding a well suited balance has proven to be... challenging, I try to be fair with myself and others as well but I no longer seek to be what would traditionally be called a "good person", and it`s interesting to see that It`s in fact a global phenomena, specially among teenagers.

Yesterday I was at my younger sister`s graduation from elementary school, I was thirsty so I went to grab a cone of water. A little boy of maybe 4 or 5 years old saw me looking for a jug that wouldn't be empty and told me "SIR, THE WATER DISPENSER IS OVER THERE" and it was very funny because he sounded so formal and well he was such a small child, hearing him say that really made me feel old hahaha, I mean damn I`m only 22! only 22...only..22...

-I don't feel like a SIR!!, I am still latest gen! lol WHO DO YOU THINK I AM! SOME FREAKING SENIOR CITIZEN! I AIN`T GOT NOT FUCKING AARP CARD YET! GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE YOU LITTLE PUNK! lol

Seriously though it was very interesting, come to think of it, quite some ages or stages of my life have died so far, and essentially I still am young, but to think I am an adult now, really made me have a totally new and fresher idea of what I will probably experience in the coming years.

For a long time, thanks to depression and I guess other factors, the feeling that I could achieve anything I wanted was gone, non existent, vanished, under the radar, fucked up, dead...

And now it is back! not in the same form as it was before, but it is definitely back. Drawing... singing...writing...paiting, those are mere ways for me to express my feelings on something tangible, they helped me, protect me, while I was a teenager, but now I have to find a way to... make money out of em!, you know help me achieve my goal as an adult. you know, get pro.

I don`t see it as a dream, dreams are too vague, they can be good engines, but they alone won`t do, in order to reach a goal, one must find or create yourself a project.

Those who waste their time running away or bullshitting themselves, make very hard on them, the beautiful truth to live without regrets.